Pokémon Sexualities

Introduction

In March 2023, I was asked to make a tier list ranking how lesbian each Pokémon is. That list quickly spiraled out of control and became a tier list assigning each Pokémon a specific sexuality. That tier list is literally fucking unreadable, so I'm converting it into a more readable and detailed format via this Neocities section.

The best way I can describe this tier list is "How queer is each Pokémon," but the truth is that the whims with which I assigned labels to each Pokémon are too enigmatic to describe in an eye-catching title. As such, please don't take this too seriously—this tier list is largely just me taking a joke and running way too far with it.

I made this webpage for two reasons:

1. I'm not a sadist, and I'm not going to force you to scan a hell jpeg to find where I put your fav.
2. I wrote specific notes on every single Pokémon, because if I didn't do this then I would have ended up with approximately 3.7 million different tiers.

In order to not have 1,000+ fucking pages in this section, Pokémon from the same evolutionary line will be on the same page, including regional variants as well as mega/gigantamax forms. However, Pokémon with evolutions from later generations will be separate for the sake of keeping this project in Pokédex order. To find a specific Pokémon's page, locate them on the list below and click on their name.

Again, please keep in mind that I am gay and trans, and this is all meant to be silly and in good fun.Now that I got the serious description out of the way, the Bit can commence.

Disclaimers

1. I am the authority on all things Pokémon and I am God's prophet etc. etc. basically if you disagree with anything I say then you're wrong but I do respect your passion.
2. The tier list maker I used included every variation of every single Pokémon and I'm not a fucking coward so I ranked all of them individually. This means I technically rated closer to 1500 different Pokémon. Sorry if your favorite Unown letter is homophobic you're just going to have to cope.
3. Because this started as a tier list, the number of labels I used are intentionally pretty limited: I didn't want to have 3.2 million tiers on this list, so I opted to use fewer labels and elaborate in each Pokémon's description. Don't take this tier list as some sort of exclusionist commentary lmfao.
4. “Lesbian and Weird About It” is not a negative tier. They are weird in a good way unless I specify otherwise.
5. “Gay and Homophobic” encapsulates all homophobic queer Pokémon.
6. You should take this tier list very seriously and ratio me on Twitter over it. Go for the jugular. Harass me so bad I'm forced to private my account. (At the time of actually posting this, I no longer have a Twitter account. Harass me so bad that I am forced to make a new Twitter account just to private it.)
7. This is still a work in progress. I've ranked every single Pokémon's sexuality, but it takes a lot of time to fill out the smaller stats and write blurbs for every Pokémon, so I'll be posting entries in phases. If you want to know how I ranked your fav, feel free to message me. I'll at least be able to tell you their assigned sexuality. Feel free to do this especially for newer Pokémon, because I'm doing this in order so it will be a while before I get to them.
8. “Freaks” and “Little Guys” are Pokémon whose respective vibes supersede any orientation they may otherwise have. Many Pokémon fit in a sexuality tier and one of these tiers so I placed them in whatever tier had the strongest vibes.
1. Furthermore, “Baby Gays” are Pokémon who were originally “Little Guys,” but these guys have a specific air of homosexual that foreshadows their evolutions. This encapsulates every queer tier because I'm not making baby tiers for every sexuality.
9. If your fav is problematic then cope and seethe. No holds were barred in the making of this list and I roasted some of my favorite Pokémon so like learn to live a little.